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Maybe you and your spouse have discussed divorce, and you have been anticipating this moment. Or perhaps you had no idea that your spouse was thinking about divorce, and you’ve just been blindsided by a process server handing you divorce papers. Either way, when your spouse’s Petition for Divorce is placed in your hand, things get real in a hurry. Being served divorce papers means that you have decisions to make—not someday, but now. One of the first is whether you will choose to respond to the divorce papers.
You may be surprised to learn that there is no rule that you have to respond when your spouse serves divorce papers. But failing to answer doesn’t mean that the divorce won’t move forward. In Minnesota, you have about a month to answer the petition for divorce, also known as the divorce complaint. To be specific, you must file your response with the court within 30 days of being personally served, or within 33 days of the mailing or publication of your divorce papers if you were served by mail or publication.
If you don’t answer within that time frame, the court may enter a default judgment against you. That means that it will grant the divorce without your participation, which means that the court will probably grant the divorce on terms that are favorable to your spouse.
Maybe that’s fine with you, especially if you had a short term marriage with no assets or children—but most people would still consider it a risky proposition not to respond to divorce papers; there are better and safer ways to get an uncontested divorce in Minnesota.
If you’re like the majority of people, you plan to respond to your divorce papers; you just may not be sure how. If you’ve been served divorce papers, read on to find out what to do next.
The first thing to do after you are served divorce papers is to take a deep breath and read them carefully. That may seem obvious, but a surprising number of people are so stunned or upset that they fail to look closely at the papers. That can be a big mistake.
Give yourself some time to settle your emotions; even when you are expecting service of divorce papers, it’s still painful. But don’t put those papers in a drawer out of sight. Make note of any important dates on the papers—including, and especially, the date by which you must file a response.
A petition for divorce can be lengthy, especially if you and your spouse have minor children in common. Don’t expect to process everything on your first reading, or your second, especially when emotions are high. But if you know the date by which you must respond to your divorce papers, you can take the next important step: consulting with an attorney.
There are several reasons you should schedule an appointment with an attorney after you’ve been served with divorce papers. First and foremost, an attorney can interpret the documents for you, explain what you need to do and be aware of, and answer your questions.
An attorney can also listen to your side of the story and help you decide on next steps. That’s important, because you have many decisions to make at the outset of your divorce, and those early decisions will shape both your experience of the process and its outcome.
In general, the less conflict there is in a divorce, and the more you and your spouse are able to work out on your own, the easier (and less expensive) the divorce is for everyone. Some divorces require more help from an attorney at every step; others need only occasional consultation and review of documents to make sure you are on the right track. An ethical attorney will work to help you protect your interests without stirring up unnecessary conflict, giving you the level of support you need—not more or less.
Meeting with an attorney at the outset of your divorce also allows you to evaluate your options for the process. For instance, you and your spouse may decide to pursue private divorce mediation to settle any unresolved issues in your divorce. Doing so can simplify and shorten the divorce process if you and your spouse are both willing to negotiate.
Although it is possible to divorce without an attorney, if your spouse has one, you should, too. Your spouse’s attorney represents only their interests. Without someone in your corner, you are at a disadvantage.
Once you are working with an attorney, you don’t have to make any more decisions alone. You bring to the table your knowledge of your family and its needs; the attorney supplies experience with the Minnesota divorce process to inform your choices.
Your attorney can prepare and file your answer (and if necessary, a counterclaim) to your spouse’s petition for divorce. After that, you can expect the following milestones in your divorce.
Your attorney can appear with you at this initial hearing before a judge. Your spouse and their attorney will be present as well. In this hearing, the judge will get a sense of what issues are disputed in your case, advise you of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) options, and set deadlines in the case.
In divorce, as in any lawsuit, you and the other party have the right to seek and gather information from each other to support your case. This process is called discovery, and may involve tools such as informal discovery, interrogatories (written questions), requests for production of documents, and in some cases, depositions (verbal questioning under oath by attorneys) .
Before a divorce goes to trial, the parties must attempt to resolve any differences they have through alternative dispute resolution, such as divorce mediation or Early Neutral Evaluation. Divorce mediation involves you and your spouse meeting with a neutral facilitator, the mediator, to try to reach a mutually agreeable resolution to any disputed issues.
Early Neutral Evaluation (ENE) is a hybrid dispute resolution process to help you and your spouse reach settlement on any issues that are still disputed in your divorce with the assistance of an experienced family law mediator. You may go through financial early neutral evaluation (FENE) or social early neutral evaluation (SENE), or both, depending on your situation. The point of ENE is to provide an impartial evaluation of what a court would likely decide should the case go to trial. Having that understanding often encourages settlement.
If you have been unable to resolve the disputes in your case, even with the help of attorneys, ENE, and settlement negotiation, your case will go to trial and be decided by a judge. However, the vast majority of Minnesota divorces resolve before trial.
Having your spouse serve divorce papers is stressful, but you don’t need to manage the stress alone. Knowledge is power, and support is essential. To learn more about the Minnesota divorce process and what to do when your spouse has served divorce papers, contact Mundahl Law at 763-575-7930 to schedule a consultation.
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